MICHELE ANGELO PETRONE

Touching the Rainbow

Michele Angelo Petrone

Touching the Rainbow. A myriad of amazing colours, but it is more than about beauty, it is also very moving. Through the dark clouds of illness, shines a light, the flame of life, the soul, the emotional centre. The body is the prism, through which these natural feelings pulsate. A rainbow of emotions, a rainbow of perspectives, a rainbow of stories and a rainbow of people. A rainbow of incredible feelings, ranging from love to pain, from anger to acceptance. Here are the brave and beautiful stories of twenty three differing peoples' experience of cancer. Cancer changes everything that is familiar in our lives. We have to learn a new and exacting language, in order to express our needs, our fears and our feelings. We all dread getting cancer, can you imagine what it might be like ? The trauma of a life threatening illness, and the almost unrecognisable life change, is exasperated by our 'incapacity' as a society to address, accept and communicate openly, about the fear of our own mortality, which underlies cancer. We are all potential patients, and we will all die, yet we choose to ignore this eventuality, until it is forced upon us. Imagine then, how much harder it is, once you are affected by cancer. The world as you know it, changes over night. It is difficult to understand what is happening, let alone what you are feeling.

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Painting can be a way of expressing one's emotions, almost unknowingly. Every brush stroke is decided, if not consciously, certainly subconsciously. What is wonderful about art, is that there are no rules, as in the construction and expression of the written and spoken word. It is free, for the artist, to express in whatever, and in whichever manner the artist wishes to do so.'Truth did not' One will not receive the truth in any other way...one must enter through the image into the truth.' The Gospel of St Philip Painting can be used as a tool of exploration,but it can also be fun, be recreational, and almost dreamlike: close your eyes and see the picture within. It can allow a freedom of expression, of emotions maybe too difficult to express in words. As the saying goes, a picture can say a thousand words. The expression through this medium, is indirect, giving an almost sideways glance into oneself, through the image. An image of the invisible, made visible through paint. 'Colour Our Feelings', the project from which these wonderful images and words are taken, provided an opportunity for anyone affected by cancer, to come and 'colour' their feelings.Those affected, are not restricted just to patients, but also to carers, loved ones, family and friends, and even professionals, who also have emotional responses in such intense situations.

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As a community, we fail to realise, that one lives through illness. As an individual, the feelings that manifest in each of us, are in fact, because we are alive. The feelings of fear, pain, disbelief and anger, only give more importance to the feelings of love, happiness and the value of life. How surprising it will be to some, that through cancer, there can be very positive feelings, and the realisation that life is for 'living'. Sometimes the possibility of dying, gives permission for a way of living, not previously allowed. This is not to diminish the trauma of illness, the loss, the anger and the isolation. Freedom of expression, for all one's feelings, is so important. A feeling also that one is not alone in feeling these emotions. Who does not find it difficult to talk to someone who might be dying? The person assumes an aura of fragility, that cannot afford a mistake. We are all human, we all make mistakes, how else do we learn and go forward. Everyone is different, choosing various ways of coping, some want to know everything that is happening, others not at all, some pick solitude, others search for contact with others who understand. Some choose to believe that there is a reason for their illness, a metaphor for their life. Whatever the individual chooses to inform, supplement and even heal their life should be respected. The medical treatment only forms a part of the journey of illness. It is also important to note that healing can exist in death as well as life. Healing can be a coming to terms with illness, or death. There are so many facets to illness, to cancer, and these paintings and stories here, provide a few. A few, I hope that will help others to understand the feelings that one can encounter, and a feeling that one isn't alone with one's feeling. The language is universal, and I hope this book will help to break down the barriers of isolation, and help to heal in some way.

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